I just read this and felt the need to share. It sums up a lot of my life. And possibly explains as to why some may think I am unfriendly or rude. I had to add my own little quirk at the end...
~I am an introvert.
And, like my fellow introverts, I am sorely misunderstood.
Common wisdom says that America is a nation of extroverts and here, introversion is stigmatized. Parents worry about children who would rather play alone in their rooms than join the gang in the playground. Bookish teenagers are exhorted to break out of their shells. Adults are chastised if they would rather work alone than as team players.
I'm not shy, socially awkward or in any way (that I know of) socially inept. I don't hate people, I'm not unfriendly, I'm not stuck up, and I am perfectly capable of carrying on a conversation. I can even speak in public and do so fairly often. To meet me, you might think I'm extroverted.
But the difference between extroverts and introverts is not that the former are good at socializing and the latter aren't. It's that extroverts are outwardly focused and draw energy from social interactions while introverts are inwardly focused and drained by interactions.
That describes me perfectly. But a lot of people don't understand this.
I have been shamed many times for my loathing for the telephone (not uncommon for introverts), for my reliance on online interaction (ditto), and for my desire to leave parties shortly after arriving.
We introverts often try to push against our nature, having bought into the myth that extroversion is better and that it's the American way. But neither introversion nor extroversion are the "right" way to be. They're just different. And here in this blog, we are going to bust through extroversion bias. We will embrace our our introversion, celebrate it, learn more about it, and share strategies for living fulfilled, happy lives as introverts.
Because, fellow introverts, it's time we stop pretending and apologizing, Sure, we can present an extroverted face to the world when necessary, but it takes a toll on us in private. And I say it's time to embrace our nature and start defending our case.
If I am your Facebook friend, there is a 99.9% chance I like you. So if I see you somewhere, and I just smile and keep walking, it isn't because I am stuck up, or I am just your friend to see what is posted on your page (oh please post more pics you took of yourself in the car), it's because I am a total social retard when it comes to making smalltalk. The things I hear come out of my mouth during these awkward encounters makes me want to sew my mouth shut. I never know what to say. I absolutely HATE nosy people, so I don't want to ask questions. I don't ask about relatives, because the last time I did the person I asked about had DIED, and I stopped asking about children, because I am the #1 go to person for a free babysitter (in Alabama), because I can not say no.(It's the JuJu syndrome) And it all starts off lovely, but after a few weeks, I turn into a doormat for you (you know who you are) to leave your kid with me while you go swimming, do your grocery shopping, meet up with friends, and run all your errands, while I am sitting here waiting to do my own things. Sorry, got a little carried away there. Not that I won't keep your child, but if I do, for the love of all that is holy, try not to treat me like monkey poo, mmkay?
This is mainly for my Louisiana peeps, if I see you in that God forsaken Walmart, please don't take offense if I don't speak. I am to used to being here in Alabama, not knowing anyone, so I don't pay a lot of attention on the Dr Pepper aisle, I tend to scan over a lot of faces.
there is a chance I don't like you and I am avoiding you at all cost. ;)