Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Deep thoughts...by other people

I came across pages of memorable quotes while Stumbling...these are some of my favorites.

The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.

Today I went on thesaurus.com and searched "ninjas". The computer told me "Ninjas cannot be found". Well played, ninjas, well played.

Alarm Clocks, because every morning should begin with a heart attack.

Some people can't sleep because they have insomnia. I can't sleep because I have Internet connection.

I'm gonna go take a hot shower. It's like a normal shower, but with me in it.

If you ever get caught sleeping on the job... slowly raise your head and say, 'In Jesus name, amen'

When someone says they have to ask you a question, you think of all the bad things you've done recently.

Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to, unless you're in prison.

Don't judge a book by its movie.

Women don't want to hear what you think, women want to hear what they think, in a deeper voice.

Don't break anybody's heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206.

If there was only woman ruling the word there would be no wars. Just a bunch of countries jealous of each other.

I always wanted to be someone. I see now that I should have been more specific.

I asked Scott to give me a quote from his heart...
this is taking while...
I've rejected several...
he is definitely NOT Johnny on the spot...
now he's plagiarizing comic books...
here we go:
"It is not what you get out of life, but what you take away from it that matters"

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