Sunday, April 24, 2011

Moth balls and a 9mm

Every night my sister and I go walking from her house to mine. Tonight SHE we decided to take a different route. It's still a mile and a half, but no traffic, and more hills. I was not a fan of it, but as always, I gave in to whatever she wanted. The way up there was great. Lots of hills, we felt the burn, and not one car did we have to dodge. At the end of this road is a cemetery that is allegedly haunted. I don't like going to this thing when I am in a vehicle with a weapon. We go in, I look around for about 2 minutes, and then I am like "time to go!"

So we get ready to finish the mile and a half back, then go to my house and back, and then we would have 6 miles. A mile longer than we planned, but hey, we need all the exercise we can get. So as we're walking, about 100 yards from the cemetery, there it is. Stretched across the road. A snake. Black, with a blue back. We immediately stopped in our tracks, and then started slowly stepping backwards. I have never really been afraid of snakes, but being this close to one, unprepared, was definitely unsettling. Especially since I just left my mom's for Easter and just had flip flops on my feet. Not the steel toe boots I needed at that moment.

I stayed where I was. I was petrified. I didn't know if I was supposed to check to see if it was alive, that somehow we missed it the first time, or if I was supposed to run for the border. I was proud I remained calm. Rebecca, however, took off running like I have never seen in my LIFE!! For real it was like Forrest Gump on fire!! My first thought was if it did charge at me, was I supposed to run in a zigzag pattern, but then I remembered, "oh wait that's if I am being chased by an alligator".
I realize then this snake is not moving, and there was nothing on the other side of us but a creepy old abandoned cemetery. So I did the last thing I wanted to do. I called our husbands.

*Cue Superman theme*

Literally one minute before they arrived, it slowly slithered into the woods.

However, here they come, laughing at us, scolding us for going down that road anyway.
Scott- "what did it look like?"
Me- "black, with a blue stripe on it's back"
Scott- "It was a blue racer, oh hell, that's not poisonous!"
Me- *dirty look*
Scott- "seriously, it can't do anything to you, it's harmless!"
Me- *dirty look*

Then he actually went looking for the snake. I yelled at him for being ridonkulus, and to get his arse in the truck!

So anyway, we rode back to my mothers, drank some water, and walked the 3 miles to my house and back. Not the exercise regimen I had in mind, but it was effective. I feel the burn in my calves.

Tomorrow I am sticking to the same boring route. Snake free is the way to be. I am taking moth ball and a 9mm just in case...

No comments: