Monday, July 15, 2013

Some of July, a sexy raft, books, and Sharknado


No matter what happens this month, the air conditioning in our truck is fixed. There is no point in winning the lottery now.

Poor Dylan...
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And it's time to move.
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The Bone Bed (Kay Scarpetta, #20)The Bone Bed by Patricia Cornwell

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


I had to reread a couple of chapters when I finished it, when they revealed "the killer", I went "who?". But I did love the book, as I have all of The Scarpetta Series.



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The Horse and His Boy (Chronicles of Narnia, #5)The Horse and His Boy by C.S. Lewis

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


I need to face the fact that the only book related to Narnia that I am going to love is The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. This one was el-boring-o. But I will not be deemed a quitter, I will finish them all.




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I asked him "what are you gonna do with that?" and he said "I want to be on the Internet!!"
Here you go, sir....
~



When we got home Saturday, we spent the majority of the evening catching up on the Coke Zero 400. Or should I say, Commercials on TNT, with 3 minutes of NASCAR.
I suffered through it, with a splitting headache only to see Jimmie Johnson win. Again.
~

I've been sick Friday and Saturday. Massive headache, lots of nausea, and more and more nausea.
No, I am not pregnant.


I missed Brandy and Grace's birthday soiree' :(
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The Colossus Rises (Seven Wonders, #1)The Colossus Rises by Peter Lerangis

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


One of the best books I have read in a long time. Very witty, face paced, and I am excited for the rest of the series to come.
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This....

is Sharknado.
Watching it while reading people talking about it on Twitter was hilarious. I was going to post some on here, but there were way too many to choose from.


Okay...Scott is the absolute worst when it comes to recognizing an actor. He mocks me because I can name an actor, what they have played in, usually their entire IMDB resume.
But he is notoriously bad at it.
Today on the way home, here is our conversation:
Scott: I watched the new Spiderman movie.
Me: Meh
Scott: It was okay. I figured you would like it, since it has Percy Jackson in it.
Me: Wrong. Andrew Garfield is in Spiderman.
Scott: Are you sure?
Me: Not even close to Logan Lerman.
+
=
*later*
Percy Jackson comes on.
Me: See? No where close.
Scott: I got the movies mixed up, I meant to say The Sorcerer's Apprentice.
Me: WHAT!!!! On what planet can you mix up Jay Baruchel with ANYONE???
I give up.
~
My Facebook status for this morning..

7 July
I just had a man ask if I49 ended in Shreveport. I told him yes, and where exactly it ended and where he can get on I20 headed to Mississippi. He said it was ridiculous that he just couldn't stay on I49. I explained that I49 runs north to south. He said I needed to talk to my (hotel) manager to get this problem fixed.

I can't even make this up......
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I followed her around all day with my hand over my heart...
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This was last month, but this was the note that Shaq left our Natchitoches SWAT team at the shooting range:
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Poor Scott can't eat anything without an audience:

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So I made a salad....

And then Scott made his salad..

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I finally get to watch a Braves game today, and what do I do?

I am going to get kicked out of the club.
~


I am way too excited for the Percy Jackson trailer:
Sea of Monsters
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What!! She picks up a hitchhiker and gets Dave Matthews. I get creepy meth mom with a switchblade.
Always pitch up hitchhikers

~


Because a woman made of plastic cost 7 grand...
HUFFINGTON POST
When Edwin Tobergta got out of jail for having sex with a pool raft, he was pumped.

So was the pool raft, apparently, because Tobergta was arrested again for having sex with the same pool raft.

Tobergta's wet and wild trysts first made a splash in 2011 when the then-32-year-old was caught getting freaky with his neighbor's pink, inflatable raft in an Ohio alleyway. The neighbor called police to report that Tobergta was on top of the floatational device with his pants "down around his ankles." The suspect fled -- with the raft -- and was arrested a short time later.

Today, Tobergta was indicted by a Butler County grand jury after a child witnessed him last month stepping out his back door, naked, then having "sexual relations with a rubber pool float," police told WHIO. The same "rubber pool float" he'd de-felated in 2011.

He's been arrested at least five times in the past for similar offenses, including a July 2008 conviction for felony public indecency.


His arraignment is scheduled for July 23.
~


Ending this half month with the thought to show your kids, your family, your spouse, your friends how much you care and love them. If you are emotionally retarded like me, there are no need for words. Your actions determine everything.
Hug them tight.
Just not me, a simple high five will do.

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

June..part two


Saturday the 15th-
Nice off day. Went to see Man of Steel. I liked it. Scott was devastated that Michael Shannon never said "Kneel before Zod". He wore his Zod shirt and everything.
When I got home I watched The Dark Knight Rises and Thor. I am all super heroed out.

Sunday-
No matter what happens in this day, I know we are having bacon sandwiches for dinner. Nothing can top that.
Happy Father's Day to everyone with daddies.

Monday-
Went to a wake tonight. A good friend lost her sister.
Hugs.
Not much happy today.
However, I just watched my neighbor burn her husband's stuff in their yard.
I smile.

I don't care what they say about you Slash, baby, you'll always be my boo.

Tuesday-
Pizza Hut gave me a medium pizza for free.
Everything else is irrelevant.

Wednesday-
I cooked. Sausage Pasta

Nom.

I am sad James Gandolfini died. Anyone with Gandalf in their name is cool in my book.


Thursday-

Today was a nice off day. I cleaned half of the house, and began my journey with the show Heroes. Granted I didn't finish the first episode, but I WILL!! Scott and I watched The Avengers, again, and ate Alfredo Chicken & Broccoli for dinner.

I don't like to yell at the little dog, but this is the third night she screams like a woman when we won't let her in the bed with us. I either have to scream at her to shut up, or put her in the microwave.

Ancient RevengeAncient Revenge by J.F. Lourens

My rating: 1 of 5 stars


I quit reading 33 chapters into it. I am very open minded, but to say that Mary Magdalene, not Jesus, performed miracles, and that Jesus survived the crucifixion and Mary Magdalene brought Him back to life is ridiculous and insulting.



View all my reviews



Friday-
This is how I feel today:

I have zero get up and go. I had to call my mother to help me move the couch, because clearly the hidabed in this things weighs 100 pounds. I tried and tried to tip this thing, but no go. Couch moved, swept under, mopped, moved back. And that was just about all I had in me. I fell asleep watching Lord of the Rings and woke up in time to order dinner from Chili's.
I think the plans I had to mow the grass is gone with the wind.

Today is a very eventful day. It is:
Rebecca and Steven's 5ish year anniversary.
It would have been my parents 36ish year anniversary.
The first day of summer. Boo.
I saw on Facebook several birthdays and anniversaries today.
MOST IMPORTANTLY, it is Little Texas' guitarist Porter Howell's birthday.

Clicking here will help you understand my obsession.

Saturday-
Work, groceries, Indiana Jones, grilled burgers and hot dogs, indigestion, sleep.

Saw this outside of work:

It's hard to tell because I took it through my dirty windshield and her dirty glass wall, but these were the longest earrings I have ever seen personally in my life:


Tuesday-
So Lisa, what's the creepiest thing you saw today?


We got a new couch today, and did NOT kill each other trying to get the old couch out. Yay. When Callie came inside, she always runs at full force to the kitchen. She ran, while looking terrified at the couch. I wish I could have gotten her face on camera.
Kind of like this:


Wednesday-
Chest and arm pain all day and night.
I lived.

This was the note I received when I gave the housekeeper her assignment for the day:


Thursday-
PAYDAY!!!

Even though we KNOW better, we went to the Sonic by the University. Scott began to order, a cheeseburger with mayo, she asked did he want mayo, ketchup, or mustard..he went "um, Mayo?" she gave him his total and hung up. He calls her back.."I wasn't finished ordering", she goes "what?" he said, "I wasn't finished ordering?"..there was confusion. Finally she got it and said he could order, but it would be on two separate tickets. Whatever. He ordered. The poor guy had to come twice with our order. Everything was correct though, and Scott got the pretzel dog, which was surprisingly good.


Friday-
It's 1pm and I have accomplished nothing besides eating half a tub of hummus, cleaning off the bar, a load of laundry, and watching the first episode of "Under the Dome".
Oh and I spilled an entire glass of Kool Aid. #winner

So we went to eat dinner, hit up the Dollar Tree, then on to the Walmart. This is the only place where we can find the sugarless chocolate milk I <3. Scott was two aisles over, I go to get the milk, which they rarely have, and alas! , there is one carton left. On the back of the shelf. That I can't reach. Even when I stand on the freezer. So I am standing there looking like a lost puppy, when this Shaq-like man comes to get milk. He is right in front of me, getting milk from the same shelf. I said "sir, I can't reach it, could you please hand me that milk right there?" He said.....no. And walked away.
my face^^^

I just stood there for a second, poked my lip out, and went to find Scott.
Milkless.


Saturday-

We spent 9 hours watching Heroes. I didn't even walk outside today.
Scott cooked all 3 meals, and then cut up half of a watermelon. I do believe I ate half of a watermelon:


Sunday-
Last day of the month. I feel like I should do something extravagant to top off this glorious month.
Meh. I'm tired.
Instead, enjoy this picture of my beautiful cousin Hunter and Shaq: